Notwithstanding the fact that nothing comes without a high price, and the government in return exact that price. It needed its pound of flesh without a drop of blood. It sucked whatever plumpness a man would desire out of her; you know when you stick that half way roasted fowl, it springs water like a broken pipe. So ended up a tough old bird, amassed a small fortune and called it a day.
Here is the thing, the woman lived under her parent’s roof all her life and has been expecting a man to take her out of her parent’s house, that is, ask her hand in marriage. I think part of the man’s repellent was that this woman was sinfully cheap, did I say a miser misery, indeed.
Needless to say, man-less and infertile she emigrated with her small fortune to the United States; got a job where she put down her bag at 9.am, and put it back on at one minute before 5.pm. Against all odds, she found a little Jamaican man that putters at the Home Depot Store and who apparently was willing to put up with her stingy ways.
This man was more than happy repairing her fixtures; fixing her pipes; chopping down nuisance bushes; and fertilizing those hard to catch rhododendrons. Truth be told, I am not far away from seeking the amenities of the simple life myself.
However, admittedly, I did the Home Depot scene sometimes ago and it did not work out in my favor. Imagine, this guy and I were doing biblical explorations when out of nowhere comes a big fart.
Let me sum it up in four words, that done him in, and believe you me, every time I remember the incident, I can’t help but burst out in uncontrollable laughter.
Now here is the clincher, this guy was a born again Christian whose father was a Deacon in a church, and out of embarrassment caused by his untimely flatulence, he told me that he was going to admit to his father, mind you, not to God but to his daddy that we Adam and Eve it. Dumbfounded I replied, “What is this, the Twilight Zone.?”
Listen, we are not talking about the indiscretions of a boy, but the willing actions of a big long tone, grown ass man! If anybody who should be confessing anything to anyone, is should have been yours truly.
