Girl, you sound more lousy than the boring man. In the first place, this shit sounds too contrive, if you ask me, Baubo Iambe, you a goh tell mi sey, oonu noh even dweet missionary style, or goh wey di sun no shine, an yu just lay dun lak a piece of log an just tek di ten jukes soh, bombo!, a coulda neva Jamaica oonu dey!
Moreover, if yuh really want fi know how if squint it; skin it; rock it; pitch puppa lick pon it; juice it; and move it, you kno ask docta, yu go fine a ghetto man fi mek yu go like a rat up a rhododendron and talk to some a dem leggo beast ooman bout dey, on how to do a three hour grand slam gunning the two backs beast. Mi dey yah a run mi mout, fi mi white liver cardboard man just a tek all a dis in, an a set fi mi arse!
PS - You ever tink of giving di man some put it back, that is, Irish Moss, raw eggs and peanuts with Dragon Stout or Steamed Fish and bami -